Four years ago we moved out of a
wonderful, safe and comfortable neighborhood...
downsizing to a small house in downtown Waconia.
To be honest, I didn't really want to move....
it was hard for me to say goodbye.
Goodbye to great neighbors...
...to a peaceful, quiet street.....
...to a beautiful wooded lot....
...to the many perennials I had
transplanted from previous moves...
...to a life I thought I would be
in for a very long time...
But, the decision to take this leap of faith was a blessing.
One year after we moved, Bryan lost his job which would have
been very stressful with our previous financial situation.
But our new cost of living at Little Blue made it manageable.
Time slowly moved on and the pain hurt less and less. I didn't
feel the loss of leaving it all behind as often anymore.
When we started meeting with our old small group this winter,
I really didn't think it would be that hard to visit Hunters Crest
once a month and spend time in that old neighborhood....
I was wrong.....it hurts.
I look around and see all the kids biking on nice
sidewalks and playing together on big playgrounds
in their backyards. I see all the beautiful yards
with gorgeous landscaping and decks with grills....
And the wound of my heart tears open a little bit again....
I actually ask myself, was it really worth it?
Life in this old house isn't easy....
Our roof is falling apart, our backyard is
covered with clovers and weeds. We still have
about 30% left to renovate inside.
And yet my heart has a tough time investing in our
house again. We poured tens of thousands of dollars into
our other house....for what purpose? Just to have it
look nice? Is it wrong to have a nice backyard to relax in? No.
Yet my heart breaks because there are kids in other countries
dying because their water is contaminated.....am I okay with that?
They don't have bikes or playgrounds with curly slides....
they wonder if they will have any food to eat today.
How can I justify pouring money into a piece of property that
won't last for another century when there are people dying
out there....people who may not know what will happen to
them after they die....am I okay with that?
I know we did the right thing by moving....
it just hurts sometimes....
